Ah-ha moment

I was having a conversation with my personal trainer yesterday. I basically told him that it wouldn't matter how much weight I lose, I will always feel like the "fat girl". I know this way of thinking is completely unhealthy, and it means everything I am doing to get healthy is not going to matter unless my attitude changes. Well, it happened!! I had my Ah-ha moment!! I was getting dressed to go to breakfast with Wayne and Jennsen, and I took a long good look at myself in the mirror and for once I didn't feel like I was the "fat girl"!!

This was a huge moment for me!!

A sweet read

One of the mommy boards that I participate in had this posted, and it brought tears to my eyes.

Here’s a sweet poem with some important reminders for all of us…
Childhood Doesn’t Wait
(Author Unknown)
I was sitting on a bench
while in a nearby mall,
When I noticed a young mother
with two children who were small.
The youngest one was whining,
“Pick me up,” I heard him beg
but the mother’s face grew angry
as the child clung to her leg.
“Don’t hang on to me,” she shouted
as she pushed his hands away,
I wish I’d had the courage
to go up to her and say…
“The time will come too quickly
when those little arms that tug,
Won’t ask for you to hold them
or won’t freely give a hug.
“The day will sneak up subtly
just as it did with me,
When you can’t recall the last time
that your child sat on your knee.
“Like those sacred, pre-dawn feedings
when we cherished time alone
Our babies grow and leave behind
those special times we’ve known.
“So when your child comes to you
with a book that you can share,
Or asks that you would tuck him in
and help him say his prayer…
“When he comes to sit and chat
or would like to take a walk,
Before you answer that you can’t
`cause there’s no time to talk”
Remember what all parents learn
so many times too late,
That years go by too quickly
and that childhood doesn’t wait.
“Take every opportunity,
if one should slip away
Reach hard to get it back again,
don’t wait another day.”
I watched that mother walk away
her children followed near,
I hope she’ll pick them up
before her chances disappear.

Happy Birthday Munch and things I've learned...

 One year ago today, I was preparing myself for a moment that I knew would change my life forever; The birth of my daughter, Jennsen Amelie. She came into the world with all the flair that was to be expected, and on her her own time schedule. Yep, Jennsen wasn't coming out until she was good and ready, but after 6 hours and 40 minutes of labor, there she was, all 7 pounds and 13 ounces of her!! Since she came into our life, she has changed it for the better, and thrown us some education curveballs along the way =)

3 months

6 months

9 months

I honestly thought that I would take to motherhood so easy. I mean I had siblings that were nine and eleven years younger than me, but that wasn't the case. This was my flesh and blood, which made the stress to succeed at this thing called "parenting" so much harder. But, for me I wouldn't have had it any other way. Not only have I been graced with an amazing little girl, I have the love and never ending support of my amazing husband. He has been my rock, my sounding board, my partner and I now I couldn't have made it through this last year without him., and if he is reading this..I love you!!

I have also learned some things along this journey so far:
1. Like first and most importantly, yes breastmilk is ideal for your infant, but guess what? Formula fed children thrive just as well!! It doesn't matter what they are being fed, as long as they are being loved!!
2. Just because I take my child to daycare, doesn't mean I should be looked at differently, and yes, there are parent out there that judge this choice. As much as my husband and I would love to be able to stay at home with our daughter, bills still have to get paid, therefore two working parents is necessary.
3. Yes, I know that when my child is sick it builds up her immune system, but I do not need to hear this tidbit of information, every time she gets the sniffles.
4. It does not how small an item on the floor is, my child will pick it up and put it in her mouth. This also applies to the moment I am done cleaning the floor. Inevitably, she will find the one thing that I missed and where does it go? In her mouth!!
5. Mother hood is not easy!! It is a lesson in patience, understanding and compassion.

Happy 1st Birthday!!

Lastly to you, my beautiful birthday girl: You have filled my life with so much love and joy!! I am honored to be the one that gets to watch you grow and thrive. Thank you for choosing me to be your mommy, and I hope that you will always be proud to be my little girl!! Happy Birthday Munchkin!!

The never ending battle

Me at my proudest weight so far..and where I want to get back to!!

Me at my heaviest...=(

Alright, I have been at this workout/personal trainer thing now for about a month and half, and I feel great!! I'm working out 6 days a week, and watching what I eat. When I first started the new workout/eating regimen, I was at 225 pounds. As of yesterday, I am at 213.4 pounds. The benefits I have seen to my new lifestyle: I feel better, I can see my waist again, and I have never slept better in my life!! The downside: PLATEAUS!!! Seriously, for as hard as I have been working I feel like I should have lost more by now!! I was really hoping to be at my pre-pregnancy weight by Jennsen's first birthday, and seeing how that is 2 and a half weeks away and I am 14 pounds from that goal...I don't see it happening!! I guess the only thing I can do is just keep working hard and remember the bigger picture, My beautiful Family!!

My little girl

I knew that being a Mom was going to be hard work. I mean for the first couple of months there is sleep deprivation, hormone changes and body changes. When I first brought Munch home, I honestly thought it was going to be smooth sailing, and BOY WAS I WRONG!! There were days when I wondered if I was even equipped to do this whole "Mom" thing, but then I would see her smile or hear her coo or watch her discover something new, and my faith was renewed. This ltttle girl is my whole world, and that  is why when she had a fever over the weekend, I could feel the walls crumbling down around me.

It first started when I got home from work. My Mom told me that Jennsen was not her normal vibrant self and when I picked her up I could feel that she was pretty warm. The first temperature read 101.9. I knew this wasn't good, but I also did not want to panic. Then I took her temp an hour later and it was 102.1, without hesitation off to the pediatrician's office we went.- At the pediatrician's office, we were told that it just looked like she had some fluid in her ears and no antibiotics were needed. Ok, great we have the answer to the problem, now we can go home. When we got home we gave her tome Tylenol and check her temp again, this time it was 104.3. Without a seconds hesitation, Wayne put her in the car and off to the E.R we went. Once in the E. R., they saw Jennsen immediately. After about an hour they tell us that they want to give her a catheter to rule out a UTI. Of course we asked if this necessary and they told us it was not. However, I have been told how bad a UTI can get if it is not treated properly, so I told them to do it. Being in the room when they did this procedure was the most heartbreaking thing I have had to do as a mom. Hearing her scream made me cry and all I wanted to do was hold her. After the procedure we gave her Motrin and waited. It seemed like it took forever for them to come back to take her temp, but when they finally did it had gone down to 102.3. At this point we were told we could go home.

Once at home we checked her temp a couple of times. First, it was 101.4 and finally 100.3. Our baby had finally started cooling down, and was her old energetic self once again!!

Being a Mom has yet to be as easy as I thought it was going to be, but I wouldn't trade any of my moments do far, for anything in the world.

A preview of whats to come

So, today I got an urge to start a blog and now here I am. What is my blog about you ask? That is a fine question!! My entries will probably be about pretty much anything; weight loss, observations, parenting and anything else that pops into my strange little mind. With that being said, for those of you that decide to follow me, I hope you enjoy the my adventure that I like to call...life!!